I Genuinely Care About You

Near the end of the second session I had with a client, something popped into my mind that I wanted to ask about.

In our first session, he had mentioned that he had a change of heart a couple years ago and wanted to be able to give back to people and that he benefited from professional cuddling as a way to “atone for his sins.”

He also noticed that many of the professional cuddlers that were in my area were doing this part time to help themselves get ahead. Be it paying off debt or trying to build savings, that's exactly how I started.

So instead of donating to a charity, he wanted to be generous with his sessions and give through patronizing the professional cuddlers he values for their service.

This is someone who I know was looking for professional cuddlers for years. He reached out to me when I first started, but he wasn’t a fit for me at the time. This time, however, he accepted my boundaries and we could work together. Sometimes people come to me at a different time in their life than when they had first heard about me.

So near the end of that second session I asked him, “you said something happened that made you want to be able to give back to professional cuddlers. Can you tell me about that?”

He seemed shy about talking about it at first. He even physically turned into himself. And then he sheepishly started telling the story.

He was a #MeToo person.

He was the perpetrator for many people who came forward with their stories and he had never realized it until after many women started speaking up about their own experiences. He realized, “I've been an asshole.” (His words, not mine.)

He wished he could go back to some of the cuddlers that he coerced with more money for more favors and those that he didn’t really treat like a human being, but more like a fantasy.

Hearing this, I believed him. I noticed how he felt bad and the notes of a dejected man in his voice. I imagine that he can’t apologize to them because they blocked his number and refused to see him again. And based on what he told me, I do not blame them and I probably would have done the same thing if I ran into him.

I still have records of him asking for less than ideal cuddle sessions from me, to which I promptly said, “I'm sorry, I don't offer that service.”

Seeing this, hearing this, I felt I was seeing a really vulnerable side of him. And I felt like I was with him in this.

After sharing this, he got up from the bed to check his phone and he started texting something. I didn't feel good sitting there by myself. My alarm had already gone off indicating the session was over.

I walked slowly over to him, put my hand on his back and said, “Hey. Thanks for sharing that with me.”

He turned around with wide eyes. He was amazed. He asked, “Do you know what you just did right now?”

I didn’t know what he was asking me. I just went over to say thank you.

“That wasn’t part of the session. You didn’t have to say that. You… genuinely care. That was so meaningful to me just now.” He put his phone down and hugged me tight.

After we hugged, I let go to hold his arm and say with genuine affection, “Of course! Of course I care about you.”

This isn't just about cuddling for me. This is about you and what you’re walking in the door with.

I think most of my clients would be surprised to hear that I do think about them a lot, even when I'm not working.

I worry about you.

I hope the best for you.

I am curious about how your next book is coming along.

I’m curious If you did end up going to that party you said you were going to go to.

I'm curious how your conversation with your ex girlfriend went.

I'm curious about how your job is treating you, and if you will have the courage to leave it finally.

I'm worried about your relationship with your wife and if you'll ever have the courage to tell her about what you really want.

I’m worried about your health.

I want you to have good people around you even when we’re not together.

I want you to have the courage to keep going.

I care about all these things. I can't necessarily change them for you, but I do wish the best for you.

Because I genuinely care about you.